the dope report

We all know the associations that come with meth; low rent trailer trash, backwoods personalities with missing teeth that look like they haven’t slept in a decade and more importantly, people who don’t have the money to buy coke.

Which is why it’s strange when celebrities get caught with their hand in the meth jar, it flips the script on everything we had previously thought of meth. Why are you snorting/smoking one of the most vile substances known to man when you could be getting high off fishscale grade Tony Montana?

Complex Magazine has put together a list of the top 10 celebutards caught with meth and the whole rainbow of humanity seems to be represented. Christian gay pastors, Nascar racing champions, childhood stars, C list actors with memorable roles, and female music divas.

[Complex]

• Boing Boing reports journalist Radley Balko is making fun of the Office of National Drug Control Policy for their new anti-pot disinformation campaign, which “suggest that drug users can look forward to a career as a ‘burrito taster,’ a ‘couch security guard,’ or ‘remote control operator.’ Balko calls it “lame” and challenges his readers to compile a master list of admitted pot smokers — current or former — who have gone on to lead successful lives.”

So far, the list includes: Obama, Clinton, Kerry, Edwards, Palin, Gore, Bill Bradley, Clarence Thomas, Newt Gingrich, George Pataki, Michael Bloomberg and this commenter, Sid: “I smoke every single day, multiple times a day. It seems like a majority of my waking hours are spent buzzed. I work as a trader at a hedge fund (up quite a bit on the year). I make millions of dollars a year, and the majority of my job performance is done while buzzed.”

BB

• Three Britons appeared in court in connection with a 1.7-ton haul of cocaine worth 572 million pounds, seized from a yacht off the south-west coast of Ireland. Irish navy, police and customs busted the yacht named “Dances With Waves” and arrested men by the last names of Doo, Mufford, and Wiggins. Last year, 1.5 tonnes of coke washed up on County Cork, in what local joggers called the best day of their lives. [BBC]

• Mexican drug cartels chop your head off and leave their calling card in your mouth. It’s the gringos that’ll fake your plane crash. Mexican authorities concluded as much this week when they ruled out a bomb as the cause of a fatal plane crash that killed at least thirteen, including Interior Minister Juan Camilo Mourino; President Calderon’s enforcer in their war on drogas. The plane crashed in the center of Mexico City in midday traffic – another “Goddam!” moment for nearby joggers. No trace of explosives were found the engine did not fail the Learjet. [BBC]

• The Marijuana Policy Project has a handy cheat sheet for related ballot initiatives around the country. Most states showed some common sense, with the exception of goddam California—so much for treatment and decriminalization [MPP]

• And lastly, something completely different … and necessary in Honor of Michael Crichton: “One Velociraptor Per Child”